[Reader-list] Skull and cotton candy

[rahul pandita]

Last night he came home quite late. He arrived in the
car provided to him by the company since he happened
to be a Senior Special Correspondent now. On the wind
shield and on the rear glass of the car, they had
pasted a channel sticker. On the traffic singal, when
people saw those stickers, they would inadvertently
peep inside the car. Many would even recongnise him. A
lot of fan mail also arrived in the office. There was
this letter from a girl who said she loved him because
he looked very 'cute' on the Television. She had
further added that if he also loved her then he should
wear a sky-blue shirt while appearing on Television
the next day. The girl had also sent a photo of hers.
He looked at the photo. She looked like Mona Verma. 

When he was a Principal Correspondent in Lala Ji's
channel, Mona Verma had joined then as an intern. In
two weeks time, she was anchoring a morning bulletin.
Whenever output editor Gaurav Sinha saw her, he would
smile which almost qualified as a grin. But whenever
he saw him, Gaurav would make such an ugly face as if
Dracula had bitten his neck. Whenever he had to meet
Gaurav Sinha, he would force his hands into the depths
of his trousers' pockets. He feared that if his hands
listened to his heart, he would pick up a chair lying
nearby and break it on Gaurav Sinha's head. 

The same Mona Verma was the lead anchor of Phataphat
channel now. In media circles, those days, anchors
were a topic of discussion. Many were of the opinion
that without reporting experience, putting someone on
air as anchor was stupidity. Though nobody reached at
any conclusion, the anchors became very conscious
about this fact. So much so that they would try to
grab a reporting assignment every now and then to
prove themselves. 

That evening the same bug bit Mona Verma. She went to
Gaurav Sinha and after throwing her typical
'Madhubala' sad smile at him, she managed to get
herself an assignment. The Prime Minister was
scheduled to launch an album of songs. The songs,
based on his poems, were sung by a famous Ghazal
singer. Mona was supposed to cover the event live. 

Mr. Prime Minister came, he cut open the album's first
copy and dozens of camera bulbs flashed. At seven,
Mona had to give a live chat from the location. The 7
pm bulletin began. Headlines were read and the anchor
in the studio, who happened to be Mona's friend said: 

Aayiye ab aapko seedhe liye chalte hein Siri Fort
auditorium jahan humari sanwaadata Mona Verma maujood
hai. Mona, aapse jaan na chahenge ki is album mein
Pradhaanmantri ji ka sabse pasand deeda geet kaun sa
hai? 

Mona was in front of the camera, holding a mike in one
hand and adjusting her ear-peice with the other. She
nodded while the question was asked. Then she smiled
and said: 

Ji Vaibhavi, waise to Pradhaanmantri ji ko saare geet
unke niji jaddojehad ki yaad dilate hein, pur eik geet
jo unhe sabse zyaada pasand hai, uski panktiyan mein
darshakon ke liye dohra rahi hun:

Kaal ke kapaas pur likh-likh kar mitata hun, geet naya
gaata hun...

The studio producer banged his head against the edit
machine. He yelled through Mona's ear-piece: 

Kapaas nahi kapaal (It is skull, not cotton) Mona
stood still for few seconds and then she said - maaf
kijiye, panktiyan yun hein:

Kaal ke compass pur likh-likh kar mitata hun, geet
naya gaata hun...

In the Yamlok, Yama, the God of death, laughed till he
fell down from his buffalo. Then he remarked: 

Pradhaanmantri Ji, pehle is sundari ki bhasha ko
sudharo, bade aaye kapaal pur likhne waale...

The next day, he appeared on Television, wearing a
deep red-coloured shirt. In the night he dreamt that
the girl who had sent him a photo was writing
something on his kapaal (skull) with a permanent
marker. He woke up, startled, his whole body drenched
in sweat.  








Rahul Pandita 
  www.sanitysucks.blogspot.com
  Mobile: 9818088664



		
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