[Reader-list] Update: My building and the Shahar

[abhinandita mathur]

Hi,

Here is an update on our work and experience with the project so far
and a tentative plan for the coming weeks:

We shared in the last post that this project would be presented as an
interactive multimedia website which shall comprise visual and audio
records like photographs, stories, recipes, songs, clips of shaadi
videos etc. It is for this reason that we were unsure about what to
write this time…beyond the usual updates and plans…as we are working
towards putting up a website to start uploading photos and other
stuff.

This project in many ways is a personal one and thus the experience of
pursuing it, very special. It is pretty strange to reconnect with all
old associations and ties (including each other) in context of this
project.

I moved back to Delhi/home and the Mathur building. The first task we
undertook after the official announcement of the grant was telling our
near and dear Mathurs about the project, its objective, rationale,
purpose etc. We took 5 print outs of our proposal and shared it with
our uncles, aunts, sisters, nephews and so on. And we have received
all sorts of comments and suggestions!! We thought it might be
interesting to share some of these reactions in this post:

The response in general has been stimulating and intriguing. While all
our Mathur friends and relatives have appreciated our "initiative" to
take interest in the community (sometimes understood as community
activities), a number of them are questioning the purpose and " fayda"
of a project such as this. On one hand, the project is viewed as a
noble contribution in service of the community, art or sociological
good in general; on the other, some people find it to be total waste
of resources. A cousin pointed out that rather than doing a study like
this one…which doesn't really help the community in a direct way, we
should perhaps start something like an activist's campaign to get the
status of a Scheduled Caste which will actually benefit the community.

The other frequently asked question is: "WHY MATHURS"
"abe tujhe kuch aur nahi mila", "mathuron mein kya rakha hai ab",
"apni society…don't be silly yaar…you really think its worth
studying?". Interestingly, mostly people under 30 years of age fail to
understand why anyone would be interested in our lives. Mathurs, many
of them feel are an inconsequential lot.    While the older ones feel
we should actually write a book on mathur riti reewaz.

In the proposal we spoke about certain peculiar cultural practices in
the community like, language, eating meat, drinking and music. And
that they could be very particular about maintaining their typical way
of life. The emphasis in life was to eat well and drink well. OP
Mathur in response to this observation pointed out that "as Mathurs
mostly worked in the courts of Shaukeen Emperors, they were often
obligated to drink to give company to their masters and they never
disobeyed orders".

A close friend from the building, Nalin, has been following the story
of this project from the time of its inception. Nalin is 23 years old.
He works as a software consultant for a multinational company. When we
started working on the project last month, Nalin and I spoke about a
number of things including the pros and corns of growing up in this
building, the experience of living here, Mathur khana, peena,
aesthetic, attitude and the role all this has played in shaping us as
people. He is keen to participate more actively in the project. He
wrote this piece titled

"Balconies at Shree Ganesh":

One does not need to see Jerry McGuire to realize that one experiences
a defining moment which just changes one's life; for good or for bad,
that's my topic for another article. Well, to be honest, I have yet to
experience this life defining moment, but I have had numerous
instances which have had some impact or the other on my conscience and
behavior and have resulted in the package that I am today. Most of
these moments were experienced while I was up to something, at times
with someone-not-so-special and once with someone special. And
generally, when I was doing nothing but looking around mindlessly.

But the point I want to make here is that such moments can be
experienced at the most unexpected places. For me my balcony is one
such place. This is primarily because my balcony opens up right into
what you call the heart of SGA. With a perfect view of all the
residential blocks, badminton courts, car parks, jhulle wala park and
health club, I witness the very spirit of SGA whenever I step into it.
Every Sunday, with sarson ka tel all over my body and nimbu ka ras on
my hair, I just sit in my balcony and observe life from close quarters
(apart from enjoying the smells of parisnde and aloo - bedween from
neighboring kitchens), I often wonder if I have learned so much by
just sitting here, is it the same with everyone else?

Arguably then, balconies in Shree Ganesh Apartments are the most
socially productive piece of land. For house wives, which sums upto30%
of SGA's population, it acts as a modern day equivalent to a chajja
from where they can have a keen look at who's visiting whom, who's
wearing what and who's going where. And importantly who's hanging out
of this coveted architectural wonder to have a friendly talk with,
about the daily chores, which usually consists of how busy they have
been and how its time that Tulsi Virani should start believing an eye
for an eye policy. This conversation often takes place at decibels
which can put the latest innovation in sound technology by Bose to
shame. Moreover, balconies assure them a virtual invitation card to
every mehendi, shaadi and mundan. Not that I am complaining. Because
these Mathur functions are the hunting ground for eligible bachelors.
And I am 23 and in a bit of a hurry.

For uncles, both paternal and maternal, the balconies act as the
platform which empowers them with freedom of expression which I
believe they can't practice at home because of some very obvious
reasons which every married man faces. Thus, the balcony acts as a
place from where they can preach everyone and anyone who cares to
listen; from newspaper wallah to security guards to car washmen each
of them is told how to improve their quality of service along with
every possible advice one can give under the sun. The balcony probably
makes them feel like the Pope standing majestically over the famous
verandah at the Papal Palace , giving his followers an audience. Other
than that, uncles are seen in balconies only on diwali, lighting diyas
and candles.

And for people like me, who very strongly believe that the world would
be at their feet in no time, the balcony acts as the holy spot where
they can think of productive strategies, spend some time in solitude
and attain nirvana, invisible to the outer world behind dozens of
impeccably washed clothes, neatly placed over the twine to be dried.
At least the balcony is way better than some sort of sleeping gas
induced bedrooms or tear gas induced kitchen or toilets which more
often that not are subjected to gases owing to some major
gastronomical complexities. With the emergence of cell phones and
importantly telephones etiquettes (we got to thank BPOs for that), the
number of people paying their balconies a visit have increased
phenomenally. The balcony has also undergone a major face lift. It is
like being directly proportional to the rise in stock markets. Earlier
balconies meant gas cylinders, a couple of money plants and a bulb.
But now, balconies are kept as tidy as the living room. Gas cylinders
have been replaced by cane chairs, tulips and roses now give company
to banyan tree sized money plants and the bulb resides within designer
glass. Even the trademark chimtiya have started vanishing.

But what still remains in almost all balconies is a picture or a wall
hanging depicting some deity. One might say it is because of vaastu
but I say this the way Mathur balconies are.

All these responses shall pay a role in shaping this project.
Next month we plan a walk through the gallis in old Delhi with boys,
girls and kids from the Mathur building.

This weekend we will go for our first shaadi shoot.
Venu has been working on a short essay titled "the Mathur bahu". She
plans to work on it full time next Sunday and have it ready for the
next due posting!!

Project is taking shape slowly…shall upload pictures on our blog soon.

Also...so sorry we could not respond to the earlier mails for us. but
will make sure we do now on...

Thanks!

Abhinandita and Venu