[Reader-list] "Then and now...an emotional journey" (Kashmiriyat, J&K Permanent Resident's Bill)

[Kshmendra Kaul]

from the blogspot "Searching for laughter around and inside"
 
 
Friday, March 26, 2010
 
"Then and now...an emotional journey"
 
It is a little emotional. You can consider this as musings of a Kashmiri who has left ‘home’ 25 years back and who measures Kashmiriyat by that standard. Let me take you there first.

Remember those days when a lady used to walk on the street, we were taught to keep our eyes on the ground while walking past so as to make them feel comfortable? I still have a slouch in my back because of that. Irrespective of what our background was, when a lady used to board a bus, we used to make her sit. We never had 'reserved' seats for women in any buses which we see in many other cities because we had a courtesy to stand up for them. I also remember when there was a girl's marriage in our locality, we used to go to work for that family (to serve or to prepare) and do everything possible to receive their guests well. To top this all up; we never used to have food in that house to reduce the burden on that family. People from all walks of life, all religions and all necessary skills would come, work and go. That to me is selflessness which we are known for and that to me is Kashmiriyat in simplest terms as I am no scholar or politician.

A small glimpse of where I come from and I want the readers to imagine this since many would either have forgotten and some may not have even experienced this. It was marriage of my aunts in the family and we had Rashid Uncle boiling milk one night earlier. He worked the whole night, made my father sleep that night so that my father wakes up fresh in the morning and Rashid Uncle served food the next day – hak, I remember with his hands. Later, when it was time for my aunts to leave, I remember him crying while holding them and saying “I never felt that you were not my own sister and now that you are leaving, I will get alone”. Since my childhood I don’t remember even a single occasion, be it Shivratri or Eid or any mourning, we used to be together – that to me is Kashmiriyat which I am proud of.

Many years and episodes later, when we met in Goa, he forced me and my wife (new nosh he had not seen) to have dinner with them and there, for the first 30 minutes everyone including his wife, Lauket Mauj (Little Mom) & three kids, had huddled up hugging & kissing and remembering how we used to exchange food or how I used to play with their youngest daughter and my kid sister alike, Syama. Before we left, Rashid Uncle gave Rs 200 as ‘shagun’ to my wife saying if she was in Kashmir, he would have received her as a new bride in the family. That and much more is Kashmiriyat for me. As I am writing this, tears roll from my eyes thinking about those good times of Kashmir.

This bill has demolished my ‘dream world’. Till now, it was only migration which haunted me and the fact that I have not been home since 1990 but now what haunts me more is that as a society to even conceptualize this bill, we have degraded. Let us accept that first. Who elected such people with this mindset? What culture do we want to give our kids and what would be the next similar ‘revolutionary’ bill which gets tabled? Do we have to tell Syama to be conscious of this bill while choosing her mate for life? If this bill passes, would I tell my sons that they belong to a place where women are treated unequally? I rather tell them that they are global citizens.

My prayer to whoever reads this is to please do whatever possible to get this bill rejected. We as a community and generation have a lot to answer anyway, without this bill as well. At the time of final judgment, each one of us will be asked this question – did you do whatever it takes to stop injustice? And there everyone has to answer for himself. We all have enough black spots to explain and this would be the worst as I consider this bill a crime which violates the honor of a woman. Please walk on the path laid by our forefathers - of Kashmiriyat, honoring women, saving brotherhood and spreading happiness. Let my Syama be free.

Almighty – Please grant us right sense, strengths to counter evil and forgive us for our sins due to which we are seeing what we are today.
 
Posted by RKachroo
 
http://searchlaughter.blogspot.com/2010/03/then-and-nowan-emotional-journey.html