[Reader-list] Pressure-cooked kids: An article by Anita Vachharajani

[geeta seshu]

she means rudolph steiner...not waldorf!


On Sat, Apr 2, 2011 at 3:48 PM, Chintan Girish Modi <
chintan.backups at gmail.com> wrote:

> From http://aniamit.blogspot.com/2011/03/pressure-cooked-kids.html
>
> Pressure-cooked kids
>
> By Anita Vachharajani
>
> Amy Chua’s Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, which I reviewed for the
> DNAsome weeks back, is causing a sharp intake of breath among
> educationists
> everywhere. The book is about her life as a hysterical over-ambitious
> parent, and what disturbed me, personally, is that she is not the only one
> out there.
>
> Whether it’s Ms Chua in America, or Mrs Rao in Matunga, pushing kids to
> ‘reach their potential’ begins much earlier these days. Moms I meet at
> school look at me like I just crawled in from under a particularly grimy
> rock when I tell them that my 6-year-old has only just begun to learn
> basketball and music. I can see their antennae quivering: Neglectful Mom
> Alert!
>
> One lady has been ‘showing’ her kid books of maths tables from the time he
> was 3; put him in Abacus classes by 4; ‘piano’ or keyboard classes (yes,
> it’s not just the humble ‘Casio’ anymore) by 4.5; and of course, chess by
> 5.
> Another, the mom of a 7-year-old musically gifted child, takes him for
> Hindustani, Carnatic, and ‘piano’ classes on alternative days, after he’s
> done seven hours at school. Being excessively liberal, she says, ‘If he
> finds it too much, I have told him to tell me.’ Yeah, right. See, kids live
> to please the adults in their lives. Practically everything is acceptable
> because they don’t know of alternatives. That’s why we, as parents, need to
> calm the heck down.
>
> Among the favoured classes these days are ‘phonetics’ (doesn’t matter that
> the term is wrongly used), grammar, tuition, dance, music, Abacus, Vedic
> Maths, story-telling, creativity, taekwondo and chess. Having shoved their
> clueless kids into strangers’ homes, mummies enjoy a bit of that precious
> commodity – free time. And they’ve earned it by paying to have their kids
> ‘build their potential’ and ‘increase their confidence’, no? It doesn’t
> matter that being pressurized to do too much early in life can actually
> lead
> to anxiety and diffidence in kids.
>
> Increasingly, psychologists tell us that unstructured time – when children
> hang about with friends or figure out ways to engage themselves – is
> important. Between school hours and various classes, what about this
> generation’s unstructured time? Most of us grew up with time which we were
> allowed to cheerfully waste. Turns out, that ‘wasted’ time – when we could
> do what we liked – is actually an important tool to de-stress and to build
> creativity.
>
> The real risk with parents who ‘work so hard’ is that they start expecting
> rewards. If Aryaman doesn’t make the building aunties swoon at a ‘society
> function’, then why did we send him to all those Hindustani Music classes,
> yaar? And if he does sweep ’em off their feet, then, you know, how about
> Indian Idol next? Alarmingly, The Guardian’s Terri Apter notes that
> over-parented kids often grow up to be ‘compliant and devious’, ‘obsessed
> with grades and lacking interest in their subjects’.
>
> Every generation gets the sort of writing on education which reflects its
> beliefs and aspirations. In the last century Maria Montessori, Rabindranath
> Tagore, Waldorf Steiner, Aurobindo, Gijubhai Badheka and others propagated
> a
> humanistic, benevolent approach to learning. The 70s had John Holt, who
> advocated homeschooling. It would be truly sad but telling if Amy Chua –
> who
> slaps and stresses-out her kids – were to write our generation’s
> educational
> classic!
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