[Reader-list] teen betiyon ke bad beta

[saberwal]

Sorry about your experience, Rakesh, a fallout from our pervasive patriarchy.    Yet patriarchy is having to retreat, at least in Delhi, however slowly.   In recent weeks my newspaper has carried reports of four middle-lower middle class families finding themselves in very hot water for demanding dowry.    The most assertive case was of a woman training in an electronics institute.

But there are other signs.   Most evenings I spend about 35 minutes walking in a large park adjoining Highway No. 24 in I. P. Extn.    Three or four years ago I began to notice a group of very self-confident young women in a corner of the park doing calisthenics -- pushups etc.  This women's akhara was quite extraordinary.  They continued for months and months.   Now I see that particular group only jogging, striding, around the park.   But women doing their exercises publicly is "normal" in this park and also, I notice, in other parks in the area.

Assertive women are bad news for patriarchy.    Until we find ways to knock patriarchal attitudes out of our minds, and out of all the countless occasions when these are expressed in our society, this insane longing for sons will remain with us.

Satish Saberwal



----- Original Message ----- 
From: rakesh <rakesh at sarai.net>
To: <reader-list at sarai.net>
Sent: Tuesday, May 27, 2003 4:07 PM
Subject: [Reader-list] teen betiyon ke bad beta


: Friends
: 
: I reside in Lancers Road in the neighbourhood of Delhi University. It is a 
: middle class colony, mainly the central Govt. employees are there. Last 
: Wednessday when I returned to my home I saw there was huge pandal in the 
: colony, a lavish party was going on. Since my wife had her L LM paper next 
: morning and it was very difficult for her to concentrate her last moment 
: study. So, we asked our neighbour that by what time the party will be over. 
: You know what was the reply, "are yeh abhi thode na band karenge. Teen-teen 
: betiyon ke bad beta hua hai, badi mannat ke bad kahin jakar yeh ladka hua 
: hai, aaj to sari rat chalegi yeh party." Finally, switching off the light was 
: the last alternative and we did the same. 
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